Day 38: מַכְרִיעוֹ לְכַף זְכוּת / Giving another the benefit of the doubt
Early in Pirkei Avot, Joshua ben Perahiah teaches, "Appoint for thyself a teacher, and acquire for thyself a companion and judge all men with the scale weighted in his favor (ie give them the benefit of the doubt)" Pirkei Avot 1:6). Some commentators suggest that this counsel is intended for ambiguous cases. When insufficient information suspends someone between guilt and innocence, we are told to judge them favorably. Even when meeting someone new, try and assume best intentions and withhold making quick judgments.
I think we need to push this idea even further. Even when we have preconceived opinions about someone or have had a bad experience with them, we need to treat each meeting like a fresh start and give them the benefit of the doubt.
It may feel disingenuous or counter-productive to always favorably upon others, but the experience of doing so is emotionally liberating and helps build trust and empathy.
Reflection:
What setbacks do you see in always giving people the benefit of the doubt?
Lived practice:
When you find yourself frustrated with someone, list three reasons that in any way defend that person's behavior.
